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mytra-fallen-angel:

stunningpicture:

My girlfriend is going to be an elementary school teacher. This is her handwriting.

This made me cry so hard because I haven’t seen the cursive alphabet in so long  they’ve stopped teaching it where I live 

(via pizza)

posted 1 week ago with 233,011 notes  stunningpicture)

itsstuckyinmyhead:

British Tumblr Posts photoset #2

Want to see more country Photosets?

American Photoset #1 

Canadian Photoset #3

(via brens1dalpha)

posted 1 week ago with 94,559 notes  itsstuckyinmyhead)

elven-whisperer:

Ferguson Police: He was trying to steal Candy from a store and was pushing and punching-

Store: -Actually that didn’t happen.

Ferguson Police: Well, he forced his way into a cop’s car, shoved the police man to grab and steal his gun to use on-

Witnesses: - Actually he was standing several feet away from the police, before he was shot by the police man.

Ferguson Police: Well he-

Mr. Fizzles: image

(via madqueenofdisaster)

posted 1 week ago with 5,241 notes  elven-whisperer)

cyberho:

Dick riding IS NOT a form of transportation!!!!!!!! 

(via lohanthony)

posted 1 week ago with 128,881 notes  cyberho)

witchpop:

*announces my pregnancy at your funeral to shift the attention around to me*

(Source: yoncevevo, via seanp0donnell)

posted 1 week ago with 88,748 notes  yoncevevo)

TRUE ZODIAC PREDICTIONS 99.9999% GUARANTEED SO RELATABLE YOU WILL BE MYSTIFIED

Aries: You will celebrate your birthday between March 21st and April 19th
Taurus: You will celebrate your birthday between April 20th and May 20th
Gemini: You will celebrate your birthday between May 21st and June 20th
Cancer: You will celebrate your birthday between June 21st and July 22nd
Leo: You will celebrate your birthday between July 23rd and August 22nd
Virgo: You will celebrate your birthday between August 23rd and September 22nd
Libra: You will celebrate your birthday between September 23rd and October 22nd
Scorpio: theres a chocolate coin in your ass remove it b4 ur nxt dr's appt.
Sagittarius: You will celebrate your birthday between November 22nd and December 21st
Capricorn: You will celebrate your birthday between December 22nd and January 19th
Aquarius: You will celebrate your birthday between January 20th and February 18th
Pisces: You will celebrate your birthday between February 19th and March 20th
posted 2 weeks ago with 16,186 notes  neongenesisevangaylion)

gnumblr:

gnumblr:

google is letting you design a bracelet for free and will 3D print and ship them for free in the US

image

image

go ape shit with this

now that this post has gotten around somewhat I wish I came up with better phrases for my sample bracelets

posted 2 weeks ago with 29,750 notes  gnumblr)

keyblacles:

how to get a girls panties wet:

  1. kiss her roughly 
  2. shove her down on the bed
  3. slip off her underwear
  4. slam dunk em in the toilet

(Source: yiffjpg, via seanp0donnell)

posted 2 weeks ago with 411,917 notes  yiffjpg)

kawaiigod:

girl: he cheated on me

me: then break up with him

girl: but-

me: bye

(Source: zootedboy, via pizza)

posted 2 weeks ago with 454,057 notes  zootedboy)

popularboyfriend:

guy:

*slides you $20* pls stop ignoring me

hey look a $20 bill

(Source: guy, via seanp0donnell)

posted 2 weeks ago with 415,064 notes  guy)

nico-diangelcakes:

nico-diangelcakes:

So i have this giant pencil right

image

I think we all know where this is going.

image

the amount of people saying that they were expecting me to shove it up my ass is alarming

(Source: nicodiangelbabe, via pizza)

posted 1 month ago with 336,534 notes  nicodiangelbabe)

msjewbooty:

*tap dances over to u* bitch do we have a problem

(via seanp0donnell)

posted 1 month ago with 189,940 notes  msjewbooty-deactivated20130104)

lizziemcganja:

friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?

me: i don’t have money

friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay

me:

image

image

(via lohanthony)

posted 1 month ago with 292,697 notes  lizziemcganja)

if i ever got sentenced to house arrest i’d just laugh at the judge

But then in that situation, you wouldn’t. Because you would have to have done some crimes, leaving the house constantly to declare that. So you don’t really spend time at home…

(Source: hunterandrewpence, via kianlawley)

posted 1 month ago with 554,343 notes  hunterandrewpence)

(Source: shortcut-to-wonderland, via connorfranta)

posted 1 month ago with 3,645 notes  shortcut-to-wonderland)